admin

by Travis Plumlee, Director of Family Ark Ministries

So many kids grow up and turn to alcohol and drugs. Many others get discouraged, and develop depression or anxiety. Still others start running with the wrong crowd, and as a result, make poor choices; which begins a pathway of destruction for them. So what can you do as a parent to help assure that your child will be less likely to follow these pathways? There are no 100% guarantees in an imperfect world. You can always raise your kids right, and by the bible; and they can still grow up and choose to live wrong.

However, you can say some things, avoid some things, and give your child the right foundation. Then, if they fall apart later in life, it won’t be because of a failure on your part as a parent. The foundation is poured early-on in life. Discouraged kids do drugs. Shamed kids become anxious, depressed and develop addictive behaviors. When kids feel like they are not fully accepted at home, they will start to run with the wrong crowd. There are many other explanations besides these I am listing, to cause these troubles. But many of these problems might occur because of things you say to your kids, and that is an easy thing to avoid doing.
Start off by understanding that your child or children, are like Kleenex tissues in two ways. Let me explain both.

1). Children are like Kleenex tissues in that their developing personality and self-esteem are very easy to get torn or crumpled. Think of how easy it is to tear a Kleenex in pieces. It takes very little effort. That is how it is with your kid. It doesn’t take much on your part to destroy their little hearts before they ever have a chance to grow. You are stressed out. You have had a bad day. And you snap at them. This marks their heart.

Perhaps they were talking in school. The teacher told them to be quiet and your child talked just a second longer. They didn’t get a star on their chart this week. They got a frown face instead. Don’t shame them. They already feel bad. Kids want to do well and please you. Say, “It will be okay. We will just continue to work on these things. Everyone makes mistakes. I think you are a very smart and good kid and I know you will do well in school the rest of the week, right!” Smile at them and give them a hug.

Sometimes your kids are in a bad mood. Don’t shame them if they don’t feel like hugging and kissing you and tell you 100 times they love you. Every person, even little ones, sometimes just need some down time. Don’t shame them here either. As my readers know I am a big proponent of biblical discipline. There are many instances where your kids do wrong, and you need to take disciplinary action. If your child develops an on-going pattern of misbehavior in the home or school, then we need to give them reproof or the rod. But no one is perfect. Kids make mistakes and learn from them. Help them learn from them. You don’t always have to make them feel bad to get them to do better.

Remember to always attack the behavior, and not them as a person. Don’t call them names. Cry Baby. Selfish. Brat.(Fill in the blank). You may need to correct behavior, but don’t have them feel like there is something wrong with them. Don’t think that somehow God made a mistake when He made them. And by the way, God doesn’t make any child with a deficit. They may have attention different, but they don’t have attention deficit. How would you like to be 10 and think you have a deficit compared to other kids! Don’t label.

2). Children are like Kleenex because they are absorbent. They absorb what they hear you say and do. Not all misbehavior has to be disciplined. So they messed up. Let them learn from their mistakes. Ask them what they learned. Ask them to help you problem solve. Ask, “What do we need to do different next time?” Kids want to correct their mistakes because no child wants to be a failure. They all want to succeed. And God wants them to succeed. They are His kids after all. God doesn’t want any of His kids to not be successful. Help them find the pathways that will make them successful. Not every kid has to go the same pathway. Each child is unique. Work with the teachers. Work with their educational modality, so that even with homework, they are given the right environment to be successful. Some kids take 30 minutes, and they are disciplined, motivated and done. Other kids are just as smart, but they need prodding, isolation, structured environment and help. Find what works for each kid.

Just remember you make a deposit or withdrawal every day in your child’s memory bank. When parents shame them, ignore them or criticize them; those are withdrawal days. These kids will soon be bankrupt and have troubles. Deposits are encouragement, praise and attention and affection.These kids are rich because their parents invest in them. Don’t ever forget that your children’s personality and self-esteem are as fragile as a Kleenex. They absorb. They tear easily. Constantly pray and seek God.

October 27, 2012 • 9:30 a.m.
Kewanee Baptist Church
Kewanee, Missouri

October 27, 2012 forty-two messengers, representing 21 churches, and several visitors gathered at Kewanee Baptist Church in Kewanee, Missouri for the 85th Annual meeting of the Baptist Missionary Association of Missouri.

Pastor Dan Wisely welcomed everyone and asked Bro. David Griggs to lead a song with Sis. LaDonna Baker playing the piano.

Bro. Wisely brought a timely devotional from Hebrews 12:1-2 challenging us to not be weighted down with the things of this world as we work for the Lord.

In the absence of President Jamie Haguewood, Vice President, Dan Wisely called the meeting to order and seated the messengers.

Following the preliminary enrollment report in which one petitionary letter was read, the messengers voted to accept the Pleasant Grove Baptist Church of Caledonia, Missouri into our fellowship. This church had not represented by letter of messengers for a number of years and according to our by-laws needed to petition for reinstatement. Our by-laws (page 10 of the 2011 Minutes) state in Article III – Membership, #3: “Any church not identifying with this Association either by messenger or letter for three consecutive years shall be considered as having terminated her membership.”

We enjoyed hearing from some of our National Departments about how God is blessing in all areas. Bro. Charley Holmes represented the BMAA Seminary; Bro. John David Smith represented the BMAA Department of Missions; and Bro. Charles Atteberry represented LifeWord Broadcast Ministries.

Bro. Don Burke gave a summary of the Alive Committee work this past year with the following information on the 2012 ALIVE Conference. The dates are December 27-29, 2012; the place for the meeting is the Airport Hilton in St. Louis; with Alvin Red – the speaker, Broken Vessels – the band, 321 Imp5ov – the entertainment, the City Museum – the night entertainment, breakouts with Jaclyn Rowe for the girls and ??? for the boys. The service project will be “The Shoe Man.” For more information go to the ALIVE web site at http://alivestudentconference.com/

A written report from Ministers Resource Services was accepted to be included in the Minutes.

Bro. Dennis Baker gave the Brotherhood Report noting that the men’s retreats have been good and seem to be drawing the men of our churches closer as they get better acquainted through the fellowship.

Sis. Terry Adams gave the WMA report and Sis. Janet Widger gave the Ladies’ Retreat Report. The ladies raise d almost $2,000 for Camp Garwood at their retreat.

The BMA Loan Committee gave their report along with some recommendations for changes in our by-laws which would open the way to assist churches in times of special needs. These changes will be printed as space and time permits. Contact Bro. Dennis Baker for more information. Bro. Earl Johnston announced his resignation from the committee and a plague of appreciation for his 19 years of faithful service was presented to him. Bro. David Griggs was elected to replace Bro. Johnston as treasurer.

The Kenneth Gibson Seminary Student Grant Fund report was given noting there had not been any requests for assistance this past year.

Bro. Hoffmann gave the Missouri Missionary Baptist report noting that income is not keeping up with the cost of printing and mailing the paper and he encourage more churches to send monthly offerings to help overcome this difference. He encouraged the churches to keep their mailing lists up to date to avoid return postage. All churches are encouraged to send a mailing list to Bro. Hoffmann to insure your people receive the paper. An offering from your church will help with expenses but is not required to be on the mailing list. We hope each pastor receives the paper. If not please send Bro. Hoffmann your address.

Sis. Laura Polk gave the Camp Report since Bro. Chris was unable to attend the meeting due to some physical problems. She noted how God blessed the camp this year with many souls being saved and a great attendance. The “DEW” (Dollar Each Week) program is picking up momentum and should be a blessing to the camp. Remember a special “DEW” T-shirt will be given to each one who participates in giving a Dollar Each Week by camp time 2013.

The following association officers and committeemen were elected:
President Claude Evans
Vice President Ray Thurman
Special Missions Committee – Ben Kingston (2019)
Publications Committee – Denver Page (2015)
Encampment Committee – Lucas Polk (2017)
Youth Alive Committee – Don Burke (2016)
Bro. Don Burke gave the Recording Secretary’s report.
Bro. James Hoffmann and Bro. Don Burke were reelected as Editor and Assistant Editor of the Missouri Missionary Baptist paper.

Bro. Ted Hurley brought the annual message (see page 1) before we were dismissed for a wonderful lunch prepared by the ladies of Kewanee.
Following lunch the Missionary Committee met. Missions Director Bro. Danny gave his report (see page 3) followed by a report from Bro. Jamie Jones, missionary at North Lake, Missouri. Both reported on God’s blessings on the effort in North Lake. It was a joy to hear of the excitement of this new work.

Our Mid-year meeting and Mission Symposium will be at Bethel Baptist Church in Sikeston in the month of May 2013. The Annual Meeting will be at Springdale Baptist Church in Fenton in October of 2013. Please start making plans now to attend these meetings.
Bro. Russell Chitwood was elected to bring the annual message with Bro. Danny Kirk as the alternate.

We commend Pastor Dan Wisely and Kewanee Baptist Church for being very gracious hosts and providing a comfortable and pleasant place for our very harmonious meeting. We look forward to meeting again in 2013.

The staff at the Drury Inn & Suites in Arnold took care of each request beginning at 10:00 a.m. Friday until we left at about 3:30 p.m. Saturday.

The speaker, Jaclyn Rowe, was outstanding!! Her family, her church, First Baptist, Potosi, MO and her pastor Bro. Jamie Haguewood should be proud of her sound scriptural teaching. She made it exciting to learn about King Hezekiah.

Becky Cate did an excellent job with the music and getting us started on time. She has also put together a CD with pictures from Camp Garwood. If anyone wants to purchase a copy to use in your local church to help promote Camp Garwood, contact her.

There were a total of 83 ladies in attendance representing 27 churches (two being from BMA churches in Michigan, two SBC and one ABA).

The silent auction has become a fun tradition to raise money for Camp Garwood. This year was no exception. There were close to 400 items donated and at the end of the day, we raised $1,941.00 for Camp Garwood. Let me repeat that, $1,941.00!! I am sure that before the final count is completed, we will have at least $2,000 or more donated.

This is a wonderful example of what the WMA ladies can do for mission endeavors. Even though some of the ladies participating in this retreat and auction were not active WMA ladies, they still have a heart for missions and support many of the WMA projects.
On behalf of the Retreat Committee, I thank each lady for attending and participating. We are already looking forward to the 2014 MO WMA Retreat.

Janet Widger, Chairman
MO WMA 2012 Retreat Committee.